So I say we troll the fuck out of it. Come on tumblrz, you’re good at this!
Gender reassignment is not funny. It’s not there for you to snigger at, or for you to make jokes about “would you like me to call you mister or miss?” And it is definitely NOT cool for you to be all “oh well it is difficult when you’re on the phone and they say they’re miss but you can hear they’re a man”.
You call a person by the name they give you, by the name they are comfortable with. It’s not up to you to feel uncomfortable, especially when you’re providing a service to that person. Get a grip, stop being a douche and have some respect. Jeez.
My mum just gave Amy a magazine about Kate Middleton (why this exists is beyond me) and was saying “she’s pretty isn’t she, she’s a princess like you”. Criiinge. I just responded with “she’s not a princess, she’s a Godzilla”… I mean, this kid has been bombing around growling and tickling everyone all evening. Couldn’t be further from yr stereotypical posey princess!
The thing is I don’t think my mum even means it intentionally (none of us push pink or glitter on Amy, and most of her toys are pretty genderless). It’s just so ingrained that people come out with these things without thinking. Sigh.
What is it about them you’re finding problematic? I’m interested to know as most of the criticism I’ve seen has just been kind of missing the point and objecting to the name…
Think of it as Voting Yes to AV. It’s problematic but its a step in the right direction. By not going its sending a message out that people arent interested in the debate.
This is a very good point. I think the problems that strike me are the fact that it can seem quite exclusive, and a lot of it depends on how you’re viewing the Slutwalks. If you’re seeing them as a way to reclaim the word ‘slut’ then that can make them exclusive, as there are a lot of women who can’t/won’t see any value in reclaiming the word, or for whom there is no point in reclaiming it. If you’re seeing the march as more of a sort of “this happens to all women, slut is a stupid concept, there is no such thing when it comes to sexual violence” then I guess it is more inclusive, but it is still ignoring the fact that not all victims of rape are cisgender women.
I dunno. Problems, but like Coco said, step in the right direction probably.
Something I’ve been thinking about for a long time is the gendering of babies, these strange little seemingly genderless creatures who are each unique but almost the same regardless of what lies between their legs.
When my cousin Amy was born last July, I knew it’d be difficult to find her things that weren’t pastel pink, but I didn’t realise just how difficult. (I should add that I don’t have anything against pink as such, but given that everyone else bought her stuff that made her look like a marshmallow, I wanted to give her a bit of variety.) I buy her bright colours, stripes and polka dots and t-shirts with giraffes wearing sunglasses (which, funnily enough, is from the boys’ section). Luckily, her parents have enough sense that they will dress her in whatever she’s given.
I’ve also definitely noticed the “pretty little girl”/”big strong boy” split. Amy is a very pretty baby, granted, but she’s also tough and strong as hell (crawling headfirst into the kitchen door? Didn’t bat an eyelid). I avoid gendered terms of affection as much as possible; rather than princess etc, I call her monkey or pickle or snotface. I praise her for her strength when she uses everything in sight as a climbing frame, or wants to go walking; I praise her for being clever when she learns something new. I’m rubbish at telling her off for anything (hey, I think spitting food is funny, even when it’s at me), but I know I’d be the same if she were a boy. I definitely don’t buy into this “little girls should be good but boys will be boys” crap.
I was talking to a woman in the train station the other week about this. She had her daughter with her, a beautiful blue-eyed bald 7-month-old dressed in blue striped dungarees and a white tee. She told me how folks often think her baby is a boy because of how she is dressed. “I don’t see the big deal, they’re just babies,” we both agreed.
I’m not really sure where this is going, but… I guess I just want to say, can we please stop pushing gender on our chidren before they’re even old enough to figure anything out for themselves?
A real woman always keeps her house clean and organized, the laundry basket is always empty. She’s always well dressed, hair done. She never swears and behaves gracefully in all situations and under all circumstances. She has more than enough patience to take care of her family, always has a smile on her lips and a kind word for everyone. Post your status if you too suspect that you might be a man……….
I’d like to direct y’all to check out the Bitches’ Guide to Etiquette, if you haven’t already.
When I went to scroll through the blog just now I realised they posted about this status earlier today; this is what they said:
Honestly, we are having a hard time understanding the purpose of this. Is this something that’s meant to show that women don’t act according to some master plan written by someone stuck in the 1950’s? Then why call them a man? Not that there is something wrong with being a man, but it seems to insinuate that not following these stupid guidelines makes you less of a woman. And may we just say…if anyone we know behaved like that all the time, we would be concerned.
After a weekend in which I had to (drunkenly) challenge a group of people for playing “list all the ‘black’ names you can think of”, I’ve just overheard a guy going on and on about how he “couldn’t stop gawping” (his words) at Pippa Middleton of Royal Wedding fame, and someone else respond with “awww, bless you”.
I don’t understand. Gawping is definitely not cute, it’s creepy/borderline sleazy, and suggests that whoever you’re gawping at is only there for that reason.
I hate the reaction I get for being “that person” and I hate being made to feel like I’m being overly sensitive for pointing out that this sort of shit bothers me, but…ughh. Maybe I should just go and live in a cave or something.
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